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A Healthy Perspective

(Wo)Man with the Plan

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Each year, people try to make these grand agreements in hopes of bettering themselves for the new year. These resolutions are often made without structure, leading to your commitment failing! You tell yourself: I’ll go to the gym two times a week and start eating healthy! Great in theory, but just not practical! It sounds easy enough, just go to the gym, right? The problem is, you’re not used to having that different schedule! It’s actually quite difficult to completely turn around your lifestyle, especially at the drop of a hat. So how can you avoid this pitfall?

Here’s an interesting thought: Abandon the resolutions! The strict goals never get you where you want to be, and it ends up being more stressful! Unless you HAVE to meet a specific goal, don’t put so much pressure on yourself to achieve your highest goal right away. Instead, try the following approach, and let me know how it goes!

Step One: Know where you want to be.

First and foremost, know EXACTLY where you want to be in regards to your goal. Whether this be a goal weight, a way of life, or just a new hobby you want to master, it doesn’t matter! All that matters, is that you have your end result in mind. Maybe you have a vision of playing guitar at an open mic night, or even running a marathon? Think long and hard, because once you set your mind to something, don’t change it! No one can win a race when the finish line moves!

The best way to ensure you don’t change your plans near the end is to write it down! By being able to see your goal on paper, it becomes actualized in your mind, and therefore more attainable!

Step Two: Decide

This next step is all mental, and shouldn’t be taken lightly. Find a quiet time, and think on your goal. Ask yourself a few questions:

  • How will achieving your goal make a difference in your life?
  • What’s your true motivation for achieving your goal?
  • How will achieving your goal affect those around you?

Consider the effect on those around you, and how much of a difference achieving your goal might make to you. By doing this, you can further your drive to achieve the goal, and realize why you’re really working for it. Motivations come extrinsically and intrinsically. By knowing the difference, and adjusting your methods to accommodate the difference, achieving can be easier than you think.

(We’ll discuss motivations more tomorrow, so stay tuned!)

Step Three: Decide Again!

The only way to achieve something you truly want is to make those steps, and move towards your goal. But it goes deeper than that. Each and every decision you make from this point forward should contribute to your goal, and each action as well. Not only do you achieve through action, but also through mindset. Your entire outlook should be shifted to have your goal as the main thing in sight. If you isolate that aspiration, and take calculated actions to get closer to it, you’ll be achieving your goal before you know it!

 

 

Teamwork Makes the Dreamwork

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Stop! Collaborate and Listen…

Recently discovered this article, courtesy of Forbes.com, that I’d like to share with you all! Titled “5 Ways to Build A Spectacular Team Without Damaging Your Ego”, it really gives great insight as to what mindset you need to make your team successful. Teams, in my opinion, are the best way to combine potentials, and achieve the maximum degree of success. Ever heard of a thing called a “Brain Trust”? A Brain Trust is when you collaborate with your team by talking aloud all together and solving a problem. It’s the perfect way to make sure all perspectives are seen, considered, and accounted for so that nothing goes unconsidered. If you have a problem you just can’t solve, ask the people whose opinion you value most! Your colleagues are most likely the only people who understand the given situation better than you. It’s obvious when you miss something just because you’re too close to the situation, so outside perspectives are essential! Don’t ever be too proud to ask for the help of someone who may seem much more inexperienced, because you never know what insight they might have to offer.

Always remember this – It could be the difference between success and failure!

The Team’s Back With a Whole New Edition

One way to build a team capable of bringing success to your business is to make sure you have a diversity of perspectives required to see all sides of a situation. No two people think alike, so this should be fairly easy to accomplish. People from different backgrounds and upbringings nearly always approach problems in different ways. This is helpful because others can be more resourceful, creative, or analytical than others, and THAT’S OKAY. Being the boss doesn’t mean you have to be an expert in all things, and that’s why you create a team to help you out!

Mature Mind & Creatures of Evil

By | A Healthy Perspective, Dr. John's Blog, Dreams Foundation Inc, Uncategorized, Your Six Dimensions of Whole Person Health & Wellness | No Comments

Am I Crazy…or Just Wild & Untamed?

Think about this for a moment: “mature mind” is a concept I used for probably 30 years without too much challenge.  Then, along came life with its litany of horrors and craziness, and we found all kinds of hipster, New Age ways to endure and somehow get to the point where we “accepted it all” and called ours, a civilized world.   Please (yes, I am dating myself), don’t be envious of me for having the time and profession to have talked with and counseled a good many of the perpetrators of this same claim to civilized living, because during these forays into this civilized madness, I met the “source” of the horrors and craziness – “creatures of evil” residing quietly, without gender in vulnerable men and women of all ages!  

I won’t name names, but you can fill in the blanks as you see fit.  How do we account for such behavior, and what if it expresses itself in the workplace?  Think of these “creatures of evil” residing between your ears, and having the authority to ignite a passionate desire in you to behave like a wild untamed animal! 

One of my mentors during my early years of training in psychology in general, and psychotherapy in practice was Ronald Laing, M.D., a British Psychiatrist who was to me, an inspiration, while to many of his older medical brethren, he was a mad man.  He would have characterized my “creatures of evil” a bit differently, but I think you’ll get my point from his work in 1967 (The Politics of Experience – Ballatine Books, p.55) 

“Torn — body, mind, and spirit — by inner contradictions, pulled in different directions.  Man cut off from his own mind, cut off equally from his own body — a half-crazed creature in a mad world.”

Go ahead, boo me…because down deep inside of my psyche, Dr. Laing has a “guest house” and his door is always unlocked!  So what I’m going to tell you next, comes with the support of my guest; here it is: Understand, that as civilized modern man/woman, you live in a world in which the “normal stimuli” is enough to drive you to appear in mood to be a raving maniacal wild Chimpanzee, while at another not too distant moment on the very same continuum to be seen as the epitome of  the model of civilized “mature” mental health!

Our creatures of evil don’t care too much about your public persona, and they’re not likely to interfere with your day to day decisions and value judgments, although they are fond of tampering with your choices of right and wrong, good and or bad, helpful or not in various situations which are more clearly mental health moments than anything else.

Charming, isn’t it?  Do you have some strategies to frustrate the “creatures of evil” lurking within?  Here are two of mine, the first being my favorite, the second being a pain in the rear!

  • Get up early; stay up late; challenge yourself to a cold weather walk; put on some of your favorite music and crank up the volume!
  • Do you need to “show off” about anything?  Do it, knowing you have a critic housed squarely between your ears ready to kick you in the pants…but just can’t figure you out!

BUSINESS SMARTS & GOD SENSE! …from the sidelines by Dr. John Yacenda

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GROW an EVEN MORE SUCCESSFUL BUSINESS…with no watering involved!

I want you to get so excited about what you’re doing to generate an income that you’re absolutely certain you’re good enough that if it required watering you could “Grow an even more successful business…with no watering involved!”  At one time in my research studies with organically-fertilized/grown fruits and vegetables we developed intricate raised growing beds that required minimal watering, yet produced maximum plant growth.  We thought that was an accomplishment, but we learned later the plants needed the water to properly mature in texture, taste and nutritional value.

The great news for your business is that you can still grow it famously well without watering it, but here are three SUCCESS POINTS we’ve learned you can use to help you “Grow an even more successful business…with no watering involved!

     Number 1 — Know what turns you on; know what interests you; and be certain about what drives you crazy!  Notice, I did not say to be certain about what turns you off, because your need to be flexible to sustain your business is non-negotiable.  The SUCCESS POINT 1: you’ve got to have both a forgiving, and perhaps a forgetting disposition when it comes to most customers and competitors.

     Number 2 — Markets, as well as consumers likes and dislikes change like the weather in response to a change from high to low pressure. If your goal is to sustain your business in a wildly fickle consumer market, choose how you want to take a stand, and then do it very well!  In other words, when the buying habits of consumers in your community shift from neighborhood retailers to Big Box store retailers you know the bottom line for consumers has likely shifted to product pricing.  It’s tough to compete price for price with Big Box store prices for neighborhood retailers, and it may be the only thing you have going for you is your history in the community.   The SUCCESS POINT 2: Recognize that every day during “regular” buying cycles you are building rapport and reputation with customers.  Build incentive into these opportunities for loyalty habits to develop (e.g., special product ordering, first name recognition, etc.); public relations history has relative value, and for some will eclipse the monetary savings of the Big Box on all sorts of everyday supplies and goods.  It’s an emotional appeal; yes, and we are still not machines.

     Number 3 — People talk…always, and they say exactly what’s on their minds when it comes to their experiences with service industry businesses.  My wife, Terry Rasner-Yacenda (Author of: She Is All Business, Tate Publishing), says it all the time: “Service, service, service; — if we expect to grow a more successful business we know service is essential!”  Indeed, it leads to SUCCESS POINT 3: train your staff to provide the kind of services people will remember as fair, attentive, reasonably priced, and effective!

 

 

BUSINESS SMARTS & GOD SENSE! …from the sidelines by Dr. John Yacenda

By | A Healthy Perspective, Dr. John's Blog, Open Your Eyes, Uncategorized | No Comments

Ageism ism…what?

Terry doesn’t talk very much about age in her book, She Is All Business (Tate Publishing), and ageism most certainly is not a topic business owners generally like to talk about because it suggests they have biases, even worse, prejudices against aging employees.  It’s tough to admit, but ageism is akin to the worst of isms when older employees are viewed as less worthy, less valuable, a burden to have around, even liabilities ready to break the bank.

The funny thing about ageism for many of us over 55, for example, is that we don’t relate to our age being anywhere near being old.  Who could imagine 55 being old?  Let me tell you a little story before I go on about this very “age stage” as I call it.

I’m at home the other day and the phone rings.  I pick up the receiver, “Good morning, Dr. John here…”  Silence.  “Hello,” I say.  “Oh hi, this is the XYZ survey company, and we’re looking into the radio and music-listening preferences of the public.”

“Great,” I said.

“May I ask your age; are you 55 or over?”

“Yes,” I said proudly, “and I love my music!”

To my surprise, the person asked, “Is there anyone in the household present in the age group 23-48?”

“No, there’s not.”

“Okay, thank you for your time.”

What — like I’m Mr. Music, and if I’m outside watering out in the back yard at night, Terry says the whole neighborhood hears me singing along with the music on my iPod.  If I’m watering in front I’ll have an awesome Country music station playing, and playing loudly!

This Ageism mentality is not healthy anywhere; not socially, not in the family, not in church, not in our biases and prejudices, not in our love life, and most certainly not in the work place!

Watch what you say about AGE; observe what you do about AGE; and be honest about how you feel about AGE and growing older…because all of us are doing just that!

To Heck with New Year’s Resolutions: Let’s Commit to FULLY EMBRACING Our 12 Life-Living Tips!

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12 Life-Living Tips were presented last week in my Blog as an introduction to positively framing our work and life experience.  I received enough confirmation from colleagues that this was a needed mindset and behavioral orientation that I agreed that for the first six weeks of 2016 beginning January 11th, I’ll elaborate on two of the Life-Living Tips in two separate Blog Posts each week.

So again, here are the 12 Life-Living Tips.  Here’s your challenge (to heck with New Year’s Resolutions): 1) speak these Tips into your life; 2) incorporate these Tips into the fabric of your thinking; 3) truly believe in the power & authority in these Tips and learn to incorporate them in your repertoire of personal expressions In all, you will build an ethical foundation from which to embrace these Life-Living Tips as you assess and respond to the world you perceive and create around you!  Rah rah – lets’ get started!

Life-Living Tip #1 Identify for yourself your errors and mistakes in judgment about others you’ve wrongly harmed or cast doubts upon — do it weekly, even daily.  Make the habit of self examination routine, and when appropriate, pin down the percentage of these actions that are or closely resemble “ego burps” of your own.  Recall from the original Blog Post: the meaning of oral flatulence, or more simply, ego burping is all those times you try to explain yourself by casting yourself in the best light possible, or excusing your errors as tiny lapses of good sense.

Life-Living Tip #2 Acknowledge your mistakes in judgment about others to the persons directly.  If that’s a bit too tough to begin with, share the memories of “those times” with trusted others, not to be haughty, but to be humble before other men/women.

Life-Living Tip #3 Take “wrong” patiently, by carefully and deliberately responding to unjust accusations and actions of others toward you, using the strength of your renewed character.

Life-Living Tip #4 Actively submit to authority, whether good or bad, and as you do recognize those in authority over you, are yet under the authority of others in higher authority — you’re just one small part of the big picture!

Life-Living Tip #5 Receive correction and feedback from those in authority over you, with grace and dignity, recognizing there is almost always a kernel of truth in what those in authority offer you, even if they seem to be coming from a dubious source.

Life-Living Tip #6 Don’t hesitate to accept a lowly place at the “banquet table” and attack your pride of wanting to be asked to sit at the head table and be recognized (the lowly place is the place of humility).

Life-Living Tip #7 There is personal value in purposefully associating with people of lower status than you; resist the temptation of being partial to those with status and wealth.

Life-Living Tip #8 Choose to serve others when given the opportunity; helps you to reduce the focus on yourself.

Life-Living Tip #9 Be quick to forgive by acknowledging wrongs that have been done against you and leave it at that; release the human desire for repayment for the wrong.  Forgiveness is denial of self; forgiveness is not insisting on YOUR way and YOUR justice.

Life-Living Tip #10 Cultivate a grateful heart that espouses an attitude of gratitude for the beauty and vitality in your life, remembering a grateful heart is a humble heart.

Life-Living Tip #11 Make it a purpose to speak well of others, complimenting them, building them up instead of yourself.  Flattery, however, is misleading and often driven by selfish desires.

Life-Living Tip #12 Do a second take on your level of pride; it is your nature to be proud and it is your understanding and appreciation of fellow man/woman that brings you humility.

NOW LET’S TAK ABOUT LIVING THEM…ONE BY ONE…UNTIL WE’RE DONE!